I’m gonna drink and listen to Bon Iver till I pass out.
I’m sitting in my bedroom alone, drinking alone, and listening to “Beside You” by Van Morrison over and over, wondering whether my mind or my body will give out first. At this point I’m just fighting not to lose. I don’t actually have anything to fight for. My biggest regret will always be that I didn’t amount to anything. Thats the only thing I’m really ashamed of and the truth is I’ve done several things that I should be ashamed of. I’m just holding on and waiting. Holding on. Waiting. Hoping. Wishing. I’m just holding on.
The truth is that I’m not a happy person. Sometimes I pretend because it makes people like you feel more comfortable. I do it as a courtesy to you. I don’t know why. It’s not like you mother fuckers do shit for me. Anyway, today I’m not in a courteous mood. If that’s going to be a problem for you, I guess you shouldn’t be fucking talking to me.
